Manoir de Paris

A haunted house in Paris. Why would anyone want to go there and let themselves be scared shitless for 40 minutes straight??? The reviews were fantastic... ok so it's good BUT why do I have to go there? Not to mention the fact that you went in in a small group... Oh god, can this get any worse already? I don't want anyone paying any attention to me! Can I just be a wallflower please? Or a fly on the wall? Pretty please? When I was finally willing to go, Mr. Special read on their website that you have to get there an hour before (the website actually said you may expect an hours wait in the queue -.-) and he wanted to go there by 2 o'clock (It opens at 3). Hell no am I going to wait in a queue for an hour voluntarily!

So we got there by 5PM on Sunday (troubles with the metro etc) and there wasn't anyone there! Omg where is this huge crowd they were warning us about? There were like two groups in front of us and three groups of people behind us. All French!!!!! Noooooo!!!! Then some screaming girls came in. They were literally screaming their lungs out because the three people "entertaining" us in the queue were too scary (they were just in costumes and made noises at you or breathed down your neck etc). I was hoping that they were Americans and we would be put in one group but no... french people :( We waited in the queue for about 10 min max. Our imaginations running wild and cursing ourselves why on earth did we come here. Then we were allowed to enter! ONLY the 2 of us!!!!!!!!! We were given a red glow in the dark stick for the actors to know we're english... oh god why?

We entered a dark room that led into a hallway, suddenly someone came in just like a ghost (A picture was taken at the time) with smoke around etc and crouched down and made a screeching sound like a bat. And that moment I was like WOW this is sooooooo cool!!!!! Literally the smoke effect was so real and awesome! She circled around us telling the story of the house - the monsters are hungry and going to eat us etc (I am crap at focusing and memorising what someone says when I'm too busy looking around). All in the darkness :) We were allowed to advance in the corridor and there we finally saw her face - green with warts like a true witch. So cool! :D

Other appearances were made by (in different rooms obviously):

• Phantom of the Opera - who thought I was Christine and asked me to sing (oh no!)
• Little dead girl in a smokey alleyway with death creeping around - who asked us to be play hide and seek with her but we since we didn't move said that it was too easy for her to find us (that's where I lost it and started laughing out loud :D I've seen too many sarcastic gifs etc so after that I had a stupid grin on my face the whole time)
• A piemaker who made pies of you know what and then splashed the blood with his buggers and spit on us - eew disgusting :D ruined my mascara! What an a-hole :D 
• Hunchback of Notre Dame who was of so sad and wanted to come with us
• A crazy person in the hospital who was rocking in her bed - the creepiest scary movie scene ever
• A nurse who reminded me of Silent Hill movie because of the light effects that made it stop-motion. That was so cool again. In the second stop-motion room they managed to make you think that the room is moving (Mr. Special actually asked if it is). And they way they move in that light! Freaking Awesome!!!!!!!!
• Alchemist - who tried to make us flinch when talking about how he extractes our fears (he did the pulling motion with his hand suddenly in front of your face) but mkm I'm not scared :D And it became funny instead :P

There were more than the ones I pointed out obviously but those were my most memorable moments. :)

The passage ways to different rooms were fun too and dark so at all times I was prepared someone to jump out of a dark corner to scare us. One corridor was so small that I was wondering how fat people could come here... :D Then sometimes they wanted you to follow them and ran ahead and then jumped out of a dark corner behind you instead which again I think is so well planned out because you really couldn't see them hiding there (or obvious places then) trust me I was looking. Then one corridor had black cloths with air fan pressure blowing them together, making it harder to move - Mr. Special didn't realize that it was just air and went through sideways trying to push his way through :D while I was behind him just casually strolled through :D Then the last passageway you had to crouch down - I was on my knees the last part of it - and again how to fat and not very agile people make it?

And in the last room they made me scream out loud finally :D It was like a white cloth room and the guy there asked us to follow us then disappeared then reappared behind me and voila! 

It ended kinda suddenly though. I don't know how long we were actually inside but I wanted more :D

So totally worth the money and it didn't bother me one bit that it was just the 2 of us and all the attention was on us. It made it better definitely :)

I'm getting so excited just by writing about it now :D

Ttyl ;)

Jazzz...

Sealife Aquarium and Montparnasse tower

The SeaLife centre in Val d'Europe shopping centre is A-Okay, not good not bad, just a little nice entertainment - got to touch a starfish and some slimey character. It was nicely done though, themed wtc, while I was there I thought of some things - oooh I can write this and that but now 2 days later all I can remember are the 2 HUGE tortoises swimming around and how disappointed I was at first because all the sharks were tiny (the decent sized sharks were in a different tank). We got to see rays being fed and one of them came to the surface so you could see it up close - which was so cool! 

+ the lady talked about them a bit and told us how you can see if it's a male or a female - highlight of the day - the male has 2 visible "penises" :D I felt like a five year old giggling there, and later I saw those on some sharks as well... This information will stay with me forever!

On Sunday we wanted to go to the Manoir de Paris a similar thing to the London Dungeons. Had read great reviews about it that said they take you in in small groups. Alarm bells!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO NO NO NO I want to be invisible in a large group! Like in the London Dungeons! OMG I really didn't want to go. 40 minutes of being scared all the time, but Mr. Special wanted to go so badly so I finally gave in. But destiny was against us :D There was some accident or something on line 4 which meant that it wasn't running anymore. And we were in Montparnasse, so getting to Gare de l'Est with other lines would've been a bit tricky...

Montparnasse tower it is then :D Surprisingly I got a child ticket with my ISIC student card and Mr. Special got a student price with his student card (that hasn't got a date on it so usually it's not accepted). Good start + there were no queues to get in (about 3 o'clock on a Sunday). Naturally the view is breathtaking and awesome and like I've said before I'm a sucker for nice views, I just have to go wherever there's a nice view. So I look at it for 5 mins max, take 10 photos and I'm done, we can go now :D :D :D :D :D :D Found everything: the Louvre, Notre Dame, the Eiffel Tower etc. Why do I have to stare at them for half an hour? Yeah I'm a controversial person I know that :D On the 56th floor there are screens that tell you what you can see from that particular point and even zoom in on them and nice informatic interactive screens that tell you the history of Paris and have a quizz at the end - about 10 or so different themes. I decided to look at the metro one. It was soooooooooooo loooooooooooooooong. Interesting but neverending. We noticed that now there was a bit of a crowd gathering as well and a queue to go down (when we went up there was only one other person - an employee - in the lift with us) - perfect timing :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

Ttyl ;)

Jazzz...

How to become Parisian in one hour?

A one-man comedy show that ridiculed Americans and showed how rude the Parisians are. All in good humour of course J 100% in English, well maybe more like 99% because he did teach us some key phrases to know and use while out and about in Paris (hint: they were not: hi, my name is.. etc common phrases that you can pick up from any guide book).

The highlight for me was at the start: how Americans come to look at the Eiffel Tower: a lot of oohs and aahs, a tear from joy, picture, then some more oohs and aahs, looking at someone standing next to them pointing what a wonderful tower, another tear and finally a question: „What is it?“ :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

That was obviously followed by how the Parisians ("what a load of crap!") and Africans ("Eiffel Tower! Eiffel Tower! 1 euro!) look at it. Brilliant :) That is just my kind of humour.

We were showed:

The difference between service in America (a show every time) and Paris (omg why are you here, I have other stuff to do!).

How Parisian girls dance in a club opposed to Americans and Brits.

How you can use Ooh La La:

• When seeing a cute guy at a club
• When back at his place you notice his package isn't impressive at all
• When having an orgasm

What to do when you've finally gotten a taxi - tell them GO faster (he's practically parking in the middle of the road) and not to trick you bc you're a local. And obviously he showed us what NOT to do: using an American tourist as an example :D

I enjoyed the show a lot :)

Here's a little clip of it for you :) 

Note that this show is based on taking stereotypes literally and with humour :)

Ttyl ;)

Jazzz...

Chateau de Malmaison, Moulin Rouge, Chocolate factory museum

The first Sunday of the month a lot of government owned museums and buildings are free to enter (during summer months not the popular ones like Louvre as it turns out :() and we decided to take advantage of that and go visit Chateau de Malmaison - the house where Napoleon and his family lived (later it became his wife's house). Unluckily for us it was pouring down with rain so we didn't get to enjoy the gardens :(

It is just outside of Paris and to get there we had to take 2 metros and a bus... finding the bus station at la defense was a bit tricky but we made it in time to catch the bus for the ~20 minute journey :) Luckily for us I made Mr. Special check the opening times before we went because he wanted to leave at 11AM but turns out the castle is closed for lunch 12.00-13.30 - just the time we would've gotten there -.- so I got to chill in bed for a little longer :)

The highlights of the castle were:

• Their bedroom (which was so dark and gothic)
• The fact that Napoleon thought that their bedroom was too far away from his study and moved his bedroom to a room right on top of it... It wasn't that far, but hey I'm not an important imperator who has to jump straight out of bed to work...
• Music room
• The vast grounds that we didn't stroll on because stupid rain :(

I think we spent two hours there in total.

The next weekend we finally decided to go and find Moulin Rouge! And I have to admit I was a bit wrong - only a bit, it's not just a random cabaret bar, but it actually has a big red windmill on top of it (mind you a couple of other restaurants have windmills too). And across the street there's a metro vent hole meaning that people (mostly girls in dresses or skirts) can stand on it and pose with the moulin while striking the classic Marilyn Monroe pose... :D I didn't do it... just in case you were wondering...

We also went through the Montmartre museum that had was Picasso themed (not his works on display :D but a comic about his life). Found out a couple of interesting facts about him, loved the way the house was built - doors everywhere, different levels etc. but overall wasn't too impressed (I'll state again I'm not a fan of art museums etc in general).

Then to the chocolate museum - we read mixed reviews about that (reading reviews and tripadvisor forums is now my favourite hobby :D) and must admit that for 8euros were disappointed - yeah you could learn the history and see a little demonstration how they make praliné chocolate and got to taste it later etc etc etc. I don't know what I was expecting... Something more - it was just too passive for me I guess.

L'île de la Cité

That's the island in Seine where Notre Dame Cathedral, The Justice Palace and the flower market is (obviously there are other buildings there as well).

Went inside the cathedral on a wednesday around noon, 1PM. At first the queue seemed huge but you could see that it moved quickly - we were in in about 10 minutes :) It's definitely worth to go in! Haven't been up to the tower yet though because we noticed it's open late on Friday and Saturday evenings during the summer and it would be lovely to see a panorama of Paris when it's starting to get dark :) Oh and check out the park behind the cathedral as well! :)

We'd heard about the enourmous queue to visit Sainte Chapelle and when we got there on a Saturday afternoon we were surprised because it wasn't bad at all :) so queued up. First came the security gate: they had an x-ray machine for bags and the gate for people to walk through like in airports but instead you just quickly showed them the contents of your bag and went on... what's the point? And then we saw the queue :D haha don't be fooled by the initial little security queue. It wasn't that bad though ;) I got in for free (as usual) and Mr. Special payed 8 euros I think. And to be honest we were a bit disappointed :( Yeah it's nice, no question about that but for 8 euros and all the hype, we'd expected more. So what is Sainte Chapelle? - A little unique kind of hidden chapel in the middle of houses (so you can't really see it from the street). It has two floors (open to the guests) which both are chapels, the ground floor being really dark and light comes through painted class (a really nice effect). Since there was restoration work we couldn't see the famous rose window :( And when we left we were like is that it? It took us about 15 minutes max to walk through it (you could get an audioguide for another 5 euros i think)... 

We'd bought the combined ticket to the concierge also, but as we didn't know anything about it we were kinda lost, wandering around to find where that is. Turns out you have to go back out again (to the street that is) and there is a sign there. No queue whatsoever :) but security check again. It's an old prison (where amongst other Marie-Antoinette had a cell) and shows different types of prison cells: from for the poor people who sleep on the floor to rich people who had a writing desk etc to do work. I think that was way more interesting than Sainte-Chapelle.

The latin quarter is right next to the island with its charming streets lined with restaurants and shops :) And after a short walk there is the Pantheon. A mausoleum that contains the remains of Marie Curie, Alexandre Dumas, Victor Hugo amongst other notable French Citizens - the last one died i the 70's I think (quite recently in my opinion). When we were about to leave we noticed people up on a balcony looking down on us and then were approached by a man who gave us tickets (for free) to go up there in 20 minutes. That was lucky because we were about to leave already :)

Ttyl ;)

Jazzz...

Best firework show EVER!!!!

So I thought I'd have to be all alone on the greatest day in France :( Mr. Special had to go to the UK for his graduation and none of my friends had time to come and visit me :( There was one last chance though, a Finnish girl who I know from Aber :) And she didn't have any plans either :)

Going to see the military parade was a slight fail, because neither of us wanted to go and stand in a spot for three hours before the event. We waited a bit in front of Madeleine but then thought that it might be too far and decided to go closer to the champs-elysee. Quite unsuccesfully, because all the roads were blocked (due to embassies and important buildings...) and when we finally got somewhere close - there were thousand of people everywhere. Not a fan of crowds. There were people who had climbed on trees, on posts, sitting on traffic lights, quite funny actually :D We saw some marching part of the parade :) so it wasn't a complete waste of time. And then decided to head back to Madeleine and go to her place for food. On our way back we were lucky though and saw tanks and military cars drive past us - and they drove fast too, not like in the parade they would, which was great to see (and hear - tanks make such a noise!). Also we saw planes! And they did quite a few circles above our heads - usually it's only 2-3 times they fly over you - this time it was at least 6-7! :) Horrendous crowd in front of Madeleine now :( we were litrally moving like bumpercars with babysteps. Witness a little domestic fight between a couple: the woman was just wondering why they had taken that route when she'd suggested going round it. They had little patience with each other and the crowd :D

At 6 PM we started making our way to the Eiffel tower to scout out the best place to enjoy the fireworks :) Around 7 we decided that in the middle of Champ de mars a little left from the main parc, on the steps was the perfect place :) so we sat there for 5 hours :D Sounds horrible but the atmosphere was so nice that time flew by, not for a second did I think why why why didn't I just stay home :) The concert started at 9.30. It could've been a bit more upbeat, because some of the songs were too sleepy in my opinion, it was slowly getting crowded around us. And the good thing is everyone was sitting and by 11 o'clock there was hardly any space to move now :) This was the first time I've gotten to see fireworks while sitting down the entire time :) At one point three older people were stood up. And when everyone realised that they weren't planning to sit down anywhere, they got told off by various people and were forced to move :) That's just rude to stand in front of sitting people! especially as you're the only ones standing.

And then it began. The theme was war and peace and it lasted for about 35 minutes. Wow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And it all corresponded to the music being played. Proper! At one point there were two guys in brilliant white suits climbing the tower. What an effect :) By far the best firework show I've ever seen :) I didn't get tired once (usually I get tired halfway through and hope that it finishes already). The last bang lit the whole area up and my camera managed to take a photo just then - you can just see people's heads at the bottom - the rest is white :D (I'll add some photos later :)).

And now I have to get back home (my friend lives 15 minutes away by foot, I had to take the metro -.-). The challenge begins. Line 6 (the most obvious for the tower) had been under some construction for a while now so no point in going there. The next one closest to me was ecole militaire nad obviously half the champs de mars was headed that way. When I finally got there the police had blocked it off (probably too many people trying to get in at once... makes sense). Fudge I don't even have a map!!!!! And it's dark! So I moved along with the crowd - a lot of them had also wanted to go to the metro. I decided the best bet is to walk along the seine, then atleast I won't get lost on a random street. Saw another metro station surrounded by the crowd trying to get in. As it wasn't the line I needed thought I'd just walk to the Assamblee nationale (my line has a stop there). Half an hour after midnight I finally got there (there were loads of people on the streets making their way home so I wasn't really scared walking alone). Just missed the previous train and had to wait for the next one for 7 minutes. I was a bit scared because Concorde is right before my little stop and I had visions of the train being full coming from there (the last one wasn't though). There were loads of people waiting on the other side and their train came right before ours and it was packed (obviously loads of people didn't get on and had to wait for the next one), our side ooohed outloud excpecting the worst from our train too. But when we saw that our train was luckily half empty everyone was cheering and applauding :) It got full though with each station - the worst being Montparnasse but nothing too severe and I even got to sit down most of the time :)

Ttyl ;)

Jazzz...

Disneyland Paris on a rainy day

It started raining just as we left the Studios and made our way to the main Park (the one that has THE castle) around 2-3 PM. I needed an umbrella but it wasn't pouring down and it definitely didn't kill our mood and we could still take pictures of everything :) And most of the rides/restaurants/shops etc etc are inside or sheltered the fact that it's raining (more of a drizzle in our experience) doesn't really affect anything - I actually prefer that to blazing hot sun... And since we anticipated the rain we dressed accordingly :) + they don't usually close any attractions due to weather (unless it's really really really bad and unsafe). And another perk: less people!!!!!!!!

After taking thousands of photos of THE castle, we saw that the haunted house has a 20 minute queue so on y va :) The reality was different though.... (in my opinion again, as I didn't actually time it) longer obvs. Mr. Special was impressed on the design while in the queue every ast detail said that this house "is abandoned", broken statues, trees with dark red leaves etc to create the perfect atmosphere :) When we finally got in, they left us in a little round room, then closed the door and everything went fairly dark. In french they told a story that omg you're trapped now (you can't see the door frame from inside) what you going to do etc then walls and the paintings on them started to "grow". I couldn't understand if we're moving down (I think we were as we weren't allowed to lean on the walls) or the ceiling just went higher... :D Cool though. The paintings were a clever touch: at first it was a normal portrait and then later you could see their legs to. Then we went out another door and everyone the normal haunted house part began where you were seated in the car that drove through the place. The person in charge of the queue there (just a small one dw) was great as he was on a moving floor (to make it easier for you to sit in the car) and constantly walking, sometimes not allowing people to enter if they were too happy and not scared :D so they just waited there watching him (for a few seconds while a few empty cars went past). It was a wedding/bride themed haunted house and not scary at all but I enjoyed it, and some of the holograms were nicely done, then we suddenly stopped - they said some evil spirits have disrupted the service (or something like that). Luckily we were stuck with a view to ghosts dancing, half becoming invisible. And I know this stop wasn't planned cos some people were in pitch black setting - just a corridor to pass through :D Official description : Home to all 'manor' of spooky fun, discover the haunting tale of the bride and groom never to be, with twists and turns as spooky as the spirits said to still live within its walls.

Anecdote: In Boot Hill cemetery, listen carefully to the sarcophagus for signs of life!

Then we went to check the queue for Big Thunder Mountain. 120 minutes Christ! no thank you :D Went to a shop instead (they are all slightly themed differently - according to the "land" you are at the time ours was wild west themed). Then it was 15 minutes to the parade - it's on 5.30 PM every day summertime and there were loads of people lining the path already to see it, but we got a decent spot :) I think the queues are much much smaller to the rides at that time ;) Then we saw every disney character from Mickey Mouse to Frozen, bigger (more important) characters were on floats waving and interacting with the audience and each other, other were on the ground before the float dancing an esy routine :) The princes and princesses were on carriages and showed affection to each other and waved to the guests :) so cuuuute ;) The song totally reminded me of one of the Estonian eurovision songs though (the melody that is) Eda-Ines Etti - Once in a Lifetime. So all the time I sang that in my head :D Once the parade was over we grabbed a bite to eat (enjoyed small queues ;)) because it was raining outside :(

Then made our way to Indiana Jones and the Temple of Peril, another rollercoaster :) That I later learned had a double loop :D No wonder Mr. Special looked pale white and ready to throw up in the end :D :D :D I couldn't stop laughing (he'd just eaten kebab too :D). This was outside.

Then we decided to do something less racey from now on (plus we were pretty tired aswell as it's already after 6!) So made our way to the Pirates of The Caribbean attraction which is supposed to be suitable for families. Went through a pirate world - a ship and caves... and after a 5 minute queue! Which was just walking from the entrance to the ride (I could only imagine people queueing there while we just walked through). And then right on to the boat. It was a bit funny because you could fit 20 people in the boat but the one before us had only 3 people - one family - in there, while there were people waiting in that queue :S but maybe everyone wanted to sit in first row.... We went past a restaurant where people ate :) It was all inside in a fairly dark setting and you didn't get wet, although in one place I thought we would because there was a rapid descent.... Official description: Climb aboard the attraction that inspired the swashbuckling series of films! Cruise secret caverns and catch the Pirates of the Caribbean in action as they loot, plunder and pillage. Will you escape with a souvenir snapshot to treasure?

Then we just wandered around in the kiddie section that is Fantasyland :D And went to the Snow white ride because there was no queue by that time, everyone else was with their little kiddies :D Then went on to Discoveryland and by accident (we just saw a queue of 15 minutes so we walked in) went to the Star Tours :) It's a simulator type attraction. Like a cinema theater put makes you think that you're on a spaceship and the chairs lean you forward so you'd feel that you're falling out of your chair etc. Surprisingly good :) Official description: Feel the force from the moment you pass R2D2 in a droid workshop, before taking a virtual reality ride to the Moon of Endor and destroying the Death Star.

Luckily for Mr. Special's tummy the Space Mountain (another rollercoaster) was closed and I didn't make him go there :D Instead we went to check out the castle :) It's really cool inside, with a dragons lair underneath :) Discover the fire-breathing creature lurking in the castle dungeon. And when you do, dare you make a sound? Anecdote: Have you noticed that its belly moves as it breathes? You'd better not come any closer. AAAnd in the jewellry / glass shop we saw the lady making the glass roses ourselves!!! + they have a christmas shop in there :)

We took one final look at the board and saw that the Big Thunder Mountain has a 35 minute queue :) This was our last attraction of the day :) You’ll need to hold tight as this runaway mine train weaves wildly in and out of tunnels, across wind-swept sierras and even through rivers on a ride you’re sure to find a real blast! and it was awesome :) We left the park at 10 PM - they close at 11PM and have a firework show that we missed because we had to catch the train and metro to get home :(

Funny story with the train though. There were two going to different destinations at the stop (16 minute time difference in departure) and no one was sure which one would go to Paris so we got on one, spoke to the people there for a bit, went and sat down, I played candycrush, then looked out the window and saw everyone getting on the other train -.- Needless to say our train was now empty and the people we talked to had left so we made our way to the other train too and as soon as we got through the door the buzzer sounded and the train left - that was a close one. The people we talked said that they'd looked for us but we went a bit further away from the crowded car... How nice of them though :)

Ttyl ;)

Jazzz...